Author Archive

Click Here: 13 Things You Should Do Before Reading This Vaguely Informative Article With A Leading Headline

There are 13 things you should do before clicking this link.

Pulp Fiction: Best Sport To Nap During; Experts React To Surprising Findings

Scholars discuss the merits of soccer as the most sleep-inducing sport.

Pulp Fiction: Man Enjoying Walk Suspected To Be Serial Killer

A man known for taking walks around his neighborhood was arrested on suspicion of murder.

Pulp Fiction: Bojangles' To Sue Every Restaurant Over Brunch Rights

The creator of "brunch" plans on suing every other restaurant that uses the term.

Pulp Fiction: Aspiring Young Professional Goes To Coffee Shop For Next Big Idea, Drinks Coffee

An ambitious twenty-something hypothesizes about his future in a local coffee shop.

Pulp Fiction: Breaking: Edwin McCain A Liar

The pop singer is not better now that he is older.

Pulp Fiction: “Cross Country” Epidemic Terrorizing High School Students

A silent pandemic has been invading the lives of hundreds of thousands of male high school students across the nation and has been cited as expanding exponentially like a recursive virus over the past decade. Cross country (a.k.a. “XC”) is said to start at a young age,

Pulp Fiction: 11:11 Wishes Come True; Teenage White Girls Rejoice

In a stunning moment, at 11:12 p.m. last night, magic occurred when all wishes made at 11:11 p.m. came true. An overwhelming majority of benefactors were teenage white females, mostly residing in suburban areas across the country. The good fortune, which has elated many, has people raving

‘Seven Nation Army’ Chant Rekindles The White Stripes’ Career

For reasons unknown to rock critics and sports fans alike, The White Stripes’ song “Seven Nation Army” has found second life as the “We Will Rock You” of the year, sparking record sales of the band’s Elephant to reach double-platinum status in the U.S. a decade after

The Song of Our Generation (Whether We Like It or Not)

You probably heard it for the first time on a burned CD in middle school as your not-yet-stoner friend, Scott, lit incense (thinking it would get him stoned). Later, in college, drunk Scott tried to play it on his guitar at a house party. The intro is